Growing Up in the Jedi Temple

By Izzy

Part 10: Initiate No Longer

About a week later, after the new Initiates had had time to settled down and get used to their new surroundings, they finally took the first of their trips within the Temple. Anakin’s hope came true; they went to the Water Garden.

“Not to be confused with the Room of a Thousand Fountains,” said Master Nu as she led them to its entrance. Anakin had managed, with some effort, to stay at the front of the group the whole time, even as he’d held onto Ellé’s hand for most of it. “We will certainly take you there at some time, but it is a much bigger place and to properly see it, you would have to be there longer than we planned for today. That is a place that has a lot of water in it, but its purpose of being is not the water, or what naturally surrounds water. The Water Garden was designed to contain its pools, and the various plants and small animals that thrive in water. There are three pools, each with a different level of depth, as you will see in a moment.”

There were several murmurs of awe as the door slid open, and they saw the garden for the first time. Strangely enough, Anakin’s first impression wasn’t of blue, but rather green. He had never seen so many plants in one small space in his life. They covered everything, and grew so thick and luscious he thought there must be dirt rather than floor for at least a few meters down, maybe more. Light shone from the ceiling; it seemed kind of greenish too. Even when he saw one of the three pools right in front of them, close enough that five steps, ten at most, could cause them to fall in, the water appeared to be green. It took him another moment to realize that was because of all the plants in it, as well as the quick moving objects that he thought might be fish, but they were going so fast he couldn’t tell.

“The Shallow Pool,” said Jocasta. “Although the exact distance between the surface and the bottom varies in different parts of it, nowhere does it exceed a standard meter. Despite it being, due to this, the smallest of the three pools, it is the one that contains the most life, as you will eventually be able to tell immediately. Take from that the knowledge that most life thrives only in a small amount of the space in which the universe exists, and clusters together, and living things must accept each other, and work with each other, for us all to thrive.”

As they all filed in, Anakin found himself at the edge of the pool. It felt…different, to stand there, so close to that pool. It made him feel the way he had sometimes felt when he and the rest of the Initiates were squeezed into a one of their rooms together. “Do you feel different, standing here?” he asked Ellé.

“No,” she said, sounding very confused.

“Not at all?” Maybe it was just because she was younger?

She didn’t get the chance to answer, though, because Master Nu had turned them to the right, towards another one of the pool. This one appeared smaller on the surface, but the water in it was blue, and a very deep blue. “This is the Deep Pool.” She gestured with her hands for them to spread out around it, and together they surrounded its rim, though there were more than enough of them to ring it more than twice. “It stretches down nine standard meters, plus another meter of silt, far deeper than anything else in this garden, or, in fact, anything in any of the Temple’s gardens, and conditions are artificially altered at the bottom to make it like water at the bottom of oceans far, far deeper. There are life forms in here that could not survive anywhere else on Coruscant. In any given habitable planet’s naturally evolved ecosystem, only a tiny fraction of the different lifeforms could survive at the bottom of this pool, and yet there are often many different creatures, all living together, and rare are the bodies of water in which there is no life at all; even here at Coruscant, it takes great effort to regulate it in the water tanks. From this take the lesson of the persistence of life, of its variety, and its strength.”

That was all well, but Anakin wasn’t as impressed with the Deep Pool as he thought he should be. It didn’t give him any new feelings, to look into that water, and he couldn’t see anything; he didn’t think there were any lifeforms at all in the visible part of the pool. Although the idea of the water conditions being altered at the bottom sounded interesting.

The ground was raised behind the Shallow and Deep Pools, and Master Nu led them up and over it. All the plants here were thick ones, with widespread leaves and wild vines, and they were squishy and slippery underneath their feet. Everything was wet; the water of the garden wasn’t just in the pools. They heard the sound of more water rushing even before Master Nu said, “The final pool of the garden is the Rushing Pool, and I believe we are not alone. It is quite common for Jedi coming to this garden to sit by the Rushing Pool, especially if they are accompanied.” She gave Anakin the briefest of looks at this. So that was where she and his mother had met to talk.

They had to get to the high point of the garden before they could see it. When they reached the precipice, which had a set of stone steps leading below, Master Nu’s head was not that far from the ceiling. But at last they were there, and spread below them both the Shallow and Rushing Pools were visible. The Rushing Pool was bigger than the others, an expanse of churning white that sprayed rocks and greens far around it. There was some distance between it and the Shallow Pool, and there was a large section of rocks, the biggest section of the garden outside the pools that had nothing growing on top of it. The rocks formed obvious seats and even a couple of tables, and at one of those sat a pair, one of them taller enough than the other that Anakin wondered if they two were Master and recent Padawan, because the shorter still had the ponytail, but no braid.

“The Rushing Pool…” Master Nu was saying, but suddenly Anakin couldn’t hear a single word, because as the Master turned his head, he realized it was Qui-Gon Jinn. And yes, the young man with him was Obi-Wan Kenobi; Anakin recognized him too now, and he definitely was not wearing his Padawan braid.

He knew the instant Ellé realized all these things too, because she interrupted Master Nu’s speech with her cry, and flung her arms around Anakin. At the Master’s cross, “What is this, Initiate Okrest?” she wailed, “Anakin’s going away! Kenobi’s been knighted now and Master Jinn’s going to come for him!”

“But…” Anakin stammered. “Why hasn’t he come for me already?!”

“Well, you didn’t think he was going to race to the dormitories directly from the knighting ceremony, did you?” said Tru. He managed to maneuver himself and Anakin, despite Ellé’s refusal to even loosen her grip on him, so that they were face to face, and he had the exact mixture of happiness and sadness that Anakin would’ve hoped to see. “Might even be a few days, I suppose. We’ll all miss you, Ani.”

Master Nu finished her speech on the Rushing Pool as they descended the stairs, but Anakin still didn’t hear any of it. He couldn’t keep his focus off Master Jinn, who along with Kenobi just continued to sit there and talk, even though there was no way they didn’t know they had company coming. Several more minutes they stood at the edge of the pool. This was the one with the least amount of life in it, Anakin could tell, and yet there were still living creatures in it, under the surface, maybe even in the foam.

Finally, as they started to make their way across the stones, the two men rose, and the three of them greeted each other, and Master Nu turned to Kenobi and said, “I see you are a Padawan Learner no longer, but a Jedi Knight of the Republic. Allow me to congratulate you.” She spared a glance at Anakin as she said it. He tried to keep a straight face, especially with Master Jinn there.

Kenobi bowed and thanked her, and Master Jinn said, “And you are doing good work with the Initiates, I also see. May we come with you for the rest of the tour? Perhaps we will learn something new about the garden.”

“I’m afraid I’m about done with it,” said Master Nu. “I was planning to give the Initiates a little more time to explore and meditate on their own before they go back to their usual quarters.”

“Then do that,” said Master Jinn. “I am sure Obi-Wan as well as myself will be glad to share company with all of you even so. However, I would like if, when you leave, Initiate Skywalker would stay behind.”

That could not but send a rush of reactions throughout the entire group. The exact same thing that had happened plenty of times over the past months, of course, but Anakin had never realized what it was like to be the subject of all the stares. He might have liked it, if at that moment he wasn’t feeling so completely overwhelmed by the reality of it all. He was about to become a Padawan Learner. Just what he’d always wanted, and yet it was so frightening, and when Ellé was still clutching his hand, he realized how much he didn’t want to leave her, or Tru, or Darra, or so many of the others. Who knew how many of them he’d ever see again.

“Those who feel able to meditate,” Master Nu was raises her voice to quiet to hubbub, and Anakin forced himself to pay attention to her, “may stay close to us, and I will try to guide your thoughts. The rest of you feel free to take a closer look at any of the pools you like.”

“Are you going to meditate?” Ellé asked him, looking over at his Master-to-be.

Anakin knew he should say yes, that he should prove himself worthy of being that man’s Padawan. It still wasn’t even impossible he’d reject him, he supposed. After all, there had been that whole thing with the man he had just trained to knighthood. But all he could think was there’d be plenty of time for doing everything Master Jinn said and being a good apprentice, while this might be his last chance to spend time with this girl who’d really appreciate it.

“Not yet,” he said. “Let’s go take another look at the Shallow Pool first.”

Tru went with them, and together they stood on the edge trying to gaze into its depths to see as much as they could with just their eyes, though there were so many things visible it was hard to keep track. Anakin watched a long, slender, red-gold fish slither for an eternity near the surface until it vanished into the dark watercress, then tried to count the number of tiny black things that floated past, but kept losing count, while next to him Ellé said, “I think I can see the bottom, but I can’t tell what’s on it.”

“I don’t think you can,” said Tru. “I think you’re just convincing yourself of that.”

“Don’t be mean, Tru,” said Anakin. This was going to be a hard enough day for Ellé as it was.

“I am not being mean, I’m being factual,” he said. “You can’t see the bottom; there’s got to be too much stuff on it.”

“You don’t know that,” said Ellé. “Master Nu didn’t say that, exactly. It’s wrong to just assume things.”

“She’s right, Tru,” said Anakin. “But can we not argue today, please?”

So they fell silent, and concentrated on the water, or maybe just the other two did. All Anakin could think was he’d probably see this pool again, though maybe the things in it would be different by then.

Eventually their legs got tired, and one by one the three of them sank to the ground, though they were careful to keep their feet out of the pool; they didn’t want to hurt anything in there. From his new angle Anakin could see the man who was about to become his Master, all the way by the stairs, talking with a trio of Initiates. “Better watch out, Ani,” said Ellé. “Maybe he’ll take one of them instead.”

“You are not hoping for that!” Anakin snapped at her. Did she really want to keep him with her that much, that she didn’t want him to get what he wanted?!

“No, no!” she cried, but she was giving away how upset she really was.

“She was joking, Ani,” said Tru, and there was something in his voice Anakin had never heard before, a kind of firmness and insistence, as if he was much older than Anakin. “You just said no arguing, remember?”

“Yeah, but this is important-”

“Initiates?” Knight Kenobi interrupted them.

All three were immediately silent and at attention, though them falling so seemed to surprise Kenobi. “Do not break your concentration,” he told them, and knelt beside them. Awkwardly Anakin scrambled up on his own knees. That was something Master Jinn might have told him to do, after all, and that meant he should do it too. The other two did the same.

But after a few minutes of them all just concentrating on the pool again, with Anakin contemplating how much less life there was in the middle than on the top and on the bottom, he spoke again. “You will hear many words, Initiate Skywalker, that you won’t like, from both people you like and people you don’t.”

“I know,” said Anakin, not happy at being lectured at this moment. “I mean, we’re diplomats, right? I’ll learn to be better.”

“I hope so,” said Kenobi, and his voice wasn’t really kind, but somehow in there it sort of felt like he meant it.

He wanted to ask him how much he was likely to see him. It did seem Master Nu and his mother had seen each other sometimes, but he would have missions of his own now, and so would they. He guessed he would find out, though. Be patient.

Except that at that point, he didn’t want the hour to end. But eventually, it did, and Master Nu called for everyone to come to her. Anakin continued to stand at the Shallow Pool as everyone hurried past him, calls of good luck and may the Force be with you and goodbye rushing over the place where he stood. He went back to stand among the stones as the Initiates filed out of the door. Ellé was the last to still be looking at him, though by then Darra had found her and was leading her by the hand. Perhaps she would be the one to take care of her for a while.

And then it was just Anakin, and Master Jinn, and Obi-Wan Kenobi, and Anakin guessed he could stay if he really wanted to. The elderly Master came over to Anakin, and then knelt to be eye level with him. “Do you know what it is,” he said, “you are attempting to do?”

“Trying to become a Jedi,” said Anakin automatically.

“Have you thought about what that means?”

“You spend your life helping people,” said Anakin; that seemed simple enough.

And Master Jinn smiled, and said, “It’s a bit more complicated than that, sometimes, but that will do for an answer right now.” He unflexed his hand, and Anakin saw he had a pair of tiny bands in them. “Anakin Skywalker, do you accept me, Qui-Gon Jinn, as your Master? Will you obey my instructions, and heed my wisdom, as my Padawan Learner? Will you dedicate yourself to the Jedi, to the Force, and to the good of the galaxy? Will you spend each and every day striving to be one who guards peace and justice, in service to the Republic?”

“I will,” said Anakin, and he knew he would.

“Then stay very still,” he said, and with one of the bands he took a lock of Anakin’s hair and pulled it out to hang from the side of his head. He took out and ignited his lightsaber; it was so close to Anakin’s ear the humming sound seemed to come from all around him, even before he moved it around his head. Bits and pieces of Anakin’s hair fell around them, and he trembled as the blade moved closer and closer to his scalp, though of course it never touched.

“Don’t be scared,” Obi-Wan said softly to him. “He will never hurt you.”

Still, Anakin felt much better when the blade was gone, and Master Jinn was taking the lock of hair and turning it into a tiny braid. It would grow longer, Anakin reminded himself, but even under the circumstances he couldn’t help but feel a little silly with it now. “Anakin Skywalker, I, Master Qui-Gon Jinn, take you as my Padawan Learner. Rise, and follow me.”

It was all so overwhelming that the two of them, Knight Kenobi still with them, were well out into the corridor before Anakin remembered. It was harder to get up the courage to ask than he’d thought it would be, but he managed to say, “Master Jinn, sir, you say we serve the Republic, right?”

“Yes,” said Master Jinn. “The Jedi are bound to the will of the Republic.”

“But, well…” he was going to ask this, he reminded himself. “It’s just that Master Nu told me a story, once, about Malastare, and how we, the Republic, I mean, support one of the races there, and the other one suffers because of it, and it really sounded unfair. And me and the rest of the Initiates were wondering, what do you think about that? Do you think it’s right to support the Republic when they do things like that?”

“Oh dear,” said Knight Kenobi, and he was grinning. “I’m afraid you don’t want to get Master Qui-Gon started on subjects like those, Padawan Skywalker. He will tell you lots of things the Council would not approve of.”

“Really?” asked Anakin, shocked. He’d never thought a Master would be telling their apprentice things the Council didn’t approve of.

“Yes, my new apprentice,” said Master Jinn. “And perhaps we should have that conversation later, because if we attempted to have it with Master Windu, that would not give you the best impression of either of us, going into this new part of your life when you will see plenty of him too.”

“Master Windu?” Anakin tried not to yell the question, but he wasn’t sure he succeeded.

“Yes,” smiled Master Jinn. “Obi-Wan and I are scheduled to dine with him tonight in his and his Padawan’s quarters. And yes, she will be there too. In fact, we are heading there right now.”

Anakin couldn’t say or think anything else then. He had hoped to see Padmé again, of course, but he had never imagined it would be so soon. He was glad when Master Jinn took his hand at the first corner they turned; he was not going to be paying much attention to where they were going.

Although Master Jinn did help get his attention back to that a little, when they stepped into a lift, and he said, “This is a part of the Temple you’ve never seen before. A good deal of it was destroyed both times the Sith have attacked us, but our quarters are far enough in they went unscathed. I’m afraid Master Windu was not so lucky the second time. After we eat I will take you to see where the Temple is being rebuilt, to be stronger and sturdier than it was before.”

It didn’t look much different from the parts of the Temple Anakin had seen before. Maybe the doors were a little more regular, but that was all. Yet it felt different, somehow. Anakin wasn’t even sure how, but things felt more serene here, even if apparently there was rubble and construction nearby. The people were arranged differently, he thought. Instead of all being crowded together, there were going to be one or two of them behind each door. Unless a lot of the quarters here were empty. He wished he was good enough to tell whether they were or not.

Finally Master Jinn and Knight Kenobi stopped before one of the doors, and rang the bell. When Master Windu answered, he didn’t smile, which confirmed what Anakin had already thought that he just didn’t, really, but it sort of looked like his eyes might. “Hello, my friend,” said Master Jinn, and that was weird, hearing someone call Master Windu “friend.” “I believe you know both my companions tonight?”

“I might remember them, yes.” He nodded to each of them in turn. Knight Kenobi bowed very slightly, and Anakin did the same, though as he did he tried to look behind the entrance, but he couldn’t see anyone. “Come in and sit down.”

Anakin was happy to do the first, but he wasn’t happy when he was barely inside before Master Jinn had taken him hand and pushed him into a seat, and one that left him facing away from the three doors in the room. It was a circular room, with pale walls and carpet, paler than had been in either of the dormitories he had lived in before then. The chairs they sat in were hardbacked, but not that uncomfortable. They surrounded a table covered with old paper tomes as well as electronics, which also filled two shelves that were the only other pieces of furniture in the room. The rest of it was a wide space where Anakin supposed two people could easily meditate and practice their katas together.

He was pretty sure the end of the night would see him coming to a new home that looked just like it. He pictured it, him and Master Jinn in that space together, living that way. He wasn’t sure how he felt about it. But it was part of a being a Padawan, he reminded himself, and he was still happy about that part.

“Keep your voices down,” said Master Windu. “My Padawan is currently meditating, and will remain so for I believe about twenty more minutes.” Had he said that because he’d realized Anakin was wondering where she was? If it was another Master Anakin would’ve thought so.

“That is a good lesson for young Padawans to learn,” commented Knight Kenobi, and yes, he was looking right at Anakin as he said this. Anakin was smart enough not to say anything to him.

Although of course Master Jinn was allowed to say things like, “It was certainly something I had to watch you learn when you were young, my old apprentice. Shall I tell my new Padawan about my old one?”

When Knight Kenobi didn’t respond immediately he said, “Obi-Wan, in all seriousness, if you don’t want me to…”

“That’s very kind of you, Master,” said Knight Kenobi, and he sounded very relieved and grateful, way too much. There was something going on here Anakin didn’t understand, and he wasn’t sure he liked it. Nor did he like the little something he thought he saw in Master Windu’s eyes, though his face didn’t react at all.

“In that case,” said Master Jinn, “I’ll instead tell you what I did at your age.” That made Master Windu *really* frown; probably he thought Padawans shouldn’t know that kind of thing about their Masters. “When I was eight, and still an Initiate, we had a class where we were to learn how to climb up a cliff…”

The story, of him trying to climb it without the cables when he was supposed to wait, really wasn’t one that made Anakin think any less of his new Master, even if he’d shown his own ability to be impatient in it. In fact, the ending made him laugh, even after Master Windu insisted that even if Master Yoda might have come in and caused him and a friend to hide from him, the old Grandmaster certainly had not fallen into that garden’s lake, and refused to believe Master Jinn’s protestations that he and Tahl had thought he would. Nor did he believe Knight Kenobi’s claim that while he had never seen Master Yoda fall into any bodies of water, he had seen Master Yaddle do so once.

“How is she?” Anakin asked then. “Master Yaddle, I mean. And how is Padawan Madierre?”

But in response to this, they bent their heads, and Master Windu said, “Padawan Madierre is dead.”

“It happened three months ago now,” said Master Jinn. “In a mysterious explosion in the Yaga Minor Shipyards. Master Yaddle was missing for weeks, and we help out hope for them both to be alive, while fearing they were both dead, but she was eventually found, comatose at the time, but now she is revived, and able to confirm her unfortunate Padawan’s fate.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” said Anakin, and he was, because he would have been sad to hear it about anyone he’d known, or any other Jedi.

“There have been a great many deaths lately,” said Master Jinn. “Even aside from all of those lost when the Sith attacked us. It makes us fear they may be working covertly as well as overtly, and that will make them even harder to foil.”

“Do you think, sir…” Anakin started, but just then, he heard the sound of one of the doors opening, and he squirmed around in his chair to see she whom he had waited to see again all this time.

His first reaction was one of dismay. She was limping, on a support cane. “Padmé! What’s wrong?!”

“Oh, nothing, Ani,” she laughed. She’d been crouched over the cane, but now she lifted her head, and her smile was bright enough to light up all of Coruscant. “Just a little trouble on our last mission is all. I shouldn’t need the cane for more than ten more days or so.”

“Let me help you,” he said, getting up, hesitating for a moment as he looked over at Master Jinn, but his new Master just nodded, so he went the rest of the way, until he could take her hand.

They were closer in height than they’d used to be; he wasn’t sure if she’d grown any, but if she had, he must have grown more. Except her shape was changing, her chest and hips taking the shape of an adult female. Her hair had grown back a little, but it still was pretty short, and Anakin still wasn’t sure how long it would take for him to get used to that. Other than that, she didn’t seem that different than she’d always been.

It was kind of disappointing, in a way. He would have liked to have found her having gotten much stronger, and also much happier, and more accomplished, and very obviously fastly growing towards being the wonderful Jedi Knight she ought to become. And while maybe she was all those things anyway, and it was just the injury that was hiding it, it somehow didn’t feel that way to Anakin.

Still, her heart seemed light enough that night, if only because she, too, was getting to see him again after they’d been apart for so long, and also she was probably happy for him finally becoming a Padawan. And when he asked, “So what’s been up this past year?” she downright looked excited, and he thought of all the stories she had to tell him.

But somehow he was not surprised when Master Windu said, “As to that, I am afraid she cannot tell you everything, Padawan Skywalker. But perhaps a general account of our adventures and the places we have been to would suit everyone tonight.”

“It would,” said Master Jinn. “If I have not heard about all of them, old friend, then I would like to.”

While the chair he had been seated in had forced him to face away from the doors, at least there was another empty chair near it, which Anakin thought might make Master Windu unhappy, but he made no protest when Padmé settled down so close to him. She let her Master tell the story, mostly, only making occasional interjections, things like, “Remember we read about that once, Ani, and about all the animals bred there,” and, “that’s not usual, though; more often when it rains their capital shuts down.” She said nothing when his talk about their work on Cirrios provided no explanation whatsoever for how she had gotten injured. As thrilling as it was to hear about her going to all those planets, to imagine her on them, and meeting with all these people, and having all these adventures, and accomplishing all these things, the whole thing left him longing to really talk with her.

And when the question came up of what Anakin had been up to, he knew immediately he was never going to tell her everything Master Nu had said to him about his mother in front of Master Windu. He wasn’t even ready to talk about it in front of Master Jinn, though he was sure they would talk about it all eventually. So he only told her about more general things.

He never liked his new Master more then when, after all that, he stood and said, “Obi-Wan, Master Windu, there is something else we should briefly discuss, just the three of us,” and a minute or so later, they’d gone off into one of the other three rooms, and he and Padmé were alone.

The first thing he did was jump up, then ask, “Can I hug you, Padmé? Is that safe?” In response she pulled herself to her feet, carefully knelt down, and opened her arms. She squeezed him tightly, his head against her chest, and even more than the new growth there, he felt the heaving of it, how much seeing him again was getting to her. “I missed you so much,” he choked out.

“Me too, Ani,” she sighed. “And this past year…all of it so wonderful, for the most part. I know it kind of sounds dry when Master Windu talks about it like that, but I, I just love doing what we do, going out and helping people. Well, except when we have to fight people, but that’s okay, and I can do that if it helps people too. Sometimes I think the only bad part is that you’re not here to share everything with me anymore. Of course I’ve got Master Windu now, but that sure isn’t the same!”

Anakin liked that, there Master Windu couldn’t keep her from missing him. He wasn’t even sure why it felt important to him that this be true, it just did. “And there’s so much more I want to tell you,” he said. “I think our Masters are going to come back before I even get through the first part of it. It’s about Master Nu. She’s been talking to me about my mother.”

“So you’re learning about her. That’s good, Ani, right?”

“It is,” he said. “Though it’s overwhelming, and scary too, sometimes. And that’s leaving out what Master Yoda said to me.” And that he had to tell her, talking fast and skipping over lines, but he managed to get across what he’d said, basically. “Though he said not to worry about it right now, so I’m trying not to.”

“That’s smart,” said Padmé. “I think what he meant, Ani, is about how much the Force demands of Jedi. Master Windu has talked to me about that, of course. The Force wills everyone, and us especially, to fates we are made for, so we ought to be able to face them and be suited to deal with them. But sometimes it’s going to be hard, especially since our lives are never going to be about what we want, unless it’s to be a Jedi and to serve the galaxy-or maybe just the Force; I’ve heard Master Windu and Master Jinn and other Jedi Masters debate that. We’ve all got to hope you’re up for what the Force wants you to do. But I think you can fulfill your destiny. I know you’re strong, and I trust Master Jinn to teach you everything you need to know. As Master Yoda said, don’t worry. Just work. And I believe our Masters are coming back now.”

When the three older Jedi came back into the room, their Padawans were back in their seats, but each saw their Master scrutinize them. But while he couldn’t see how Master Windu was looking at Padmé, who kept her face completely neutral, Master Jinn had a kind smile, and Anakin got the feeling he didn’t mind too much.

I can live with this, then, thought Anakin. After living the way we did before the attack, and living without seeing Padmé at all, I can handle it even if I still don’t see her much. And we can both become great Jedi Knights, which is all either of us has ever wanted. And that will make us happy. He had no doubt of any of that.

Hearts are worn in these dark ages
You're not alone in this story's pages
The light has fallen amongst the living and the dying
And I'll try to hold it in, yeah I'll try to hold it in

The world's on fire and
It's more than I can handle
I'll tap into the water
Try and bring my share
I try to bring more
More than I can handle
Bring it to the table
Bring what I am able

I watch the heavens but I find no calling
Something I can do to change what's coming
Stay close to me while the sky is falling
Don't wanna be left alone, don't wanna be alone

The world's on fire and
It's more than I can handle
I'll tap into the water
Try and bring my share
I try to bring more
More than I can handle
Bring it to the table
Bring what I am able

Hearts break, hearts mend
Love still hurts
Visions clash, planes crash
Still there's talk of
Saving souls, still the cold
Is closing in on us

We part the veil on our killer sun
Stray from the straight line on this short run
The more we take, the less we become
The fortune of one that means less for some

The world's on fire and
It's more than I can handle
I'll tap into the water
Try and bring my share
I try to bring more
More than I can handle
Bring it to the table
Bring what I am able

The world's on fire and
It's more than I can handle
I'll tap into the water
Try and bring my share
I try to bring more
More than I can handle
Bring it to the table
Bring what I am able

Sarah McLachlan, “World on Fire”